a visual diary...

Tuesday, June 19, 2018

Surviving Motherhood


How do we survive motherhood? I don't think there is an actual manual, everything we read are advice or suggestions, something to potentially give us hope. I mentioned in my last post that I have moved from home (my parent's) into a house in New Jersey, so my life changed dramatically from being a bonafide city girl, to a stay at home full time mom, in a small country like suburban neighborhood. Though the lifestyle here is way more simple and less vain, the work load has officially took its toll on me. When Sage and I lived with my parents, it was a little easier to move around, considering the help I had between them and Will. Now that we are alone and not close enough to squeeze in a little family baby sitting time, it is a bit more challenging, and honestly, overtly tiring. We don't get much sleep, everything works on Sage's nap time schedule or else we are going to have to deal with her Katey Kaboom Wrath, and in between all the errands we have to run, I still have to fit in the household duties. Now, I am not complaining, I just want to know how do women do this and not lose their sanity? Or do we lose it, but go with the flow? I am learning to keep things in order by scheduling my entire agenda, not saying that it always works out fine. But.... here are some tips that may help first time mom, though I am one myself, I can also pass on my advice so you don't lose your mind as well.


  1. Prepare the night before - Everything seems to work out best when you plan ahead for trips, dinner or laundry. I noticed when I try to cram everything in without preparing, I get frustrated because it doesn't work promptly or smoothly
  2. Take your baby out - This one I don't like to do as much because I am an extreme home body. I prefer to be in the comfort of my own home, and gratefully we have a big yard so Sage can romp around all she wants with Bo. However, taking your child outside is good enough to tire them out. There is so much to explore (though I can't stand when they pick things up) they will just get overwhelmed and crash. 
  3. Make time for tea or coffee - No matter what, I make time for my coffee, and thats usually when Sage is taking her nap, it is the most peaceful time ever. You'll feel slightly, just slightly energize before little one wakes up, especially if you catch yourself up on the latest shows, you tube videos, trends, blogs, whatever! I mean, take a NAP! I for some reason never really take naps because there's so much I feel I need to catch up on.
  4. Make time for loved ones - We can't forget that our spouses needs our time too between the mayhem. I can be a little selfish with my time but it is important in a relationship that you both remain close for your family.
  5. And lastly, find your inspiration - We have to remain creative and continue to do what it is that we love. Some times we need that push, and really don't have the right people or tools around us. I loved watching motivational you tube videos, or motivational testimonials, just because some times I need that positive energy to give me drive. 
Mother hood is draining but it is all about balancing everything out. Some days you don't need to sweep, just skip laundry for a week, eat some leftovers and enjoy your time here. 




In the photos I decided to finally take photos of myself in our living room. It was simply spirit of the moment, I did not put on any make up or prepare any outfits, just because my time is limited. 

Friday, June 8, 2018

Changing Stage

 A lot has changed since I've last posted. It killed me everyday not to be able to sign on and do what I love, take photos, edit them and share them with you all. I had to focus on other things, and at that time, that's what was important to me. However not being able to express my colors was a never ending battle! But having a child won the war, it was the beginning of my new life, as a mom! I wanted to share this with you all, but I simply didn't have time and it was easier to post on social media to those who do follow. Also, keeping up a blog is a job within itself, and since my life was going through this dramatic change, I had to choose what was priority and of course my time was limited. Furthermore, I can't say my life is in shambles, it was more of a comfortable battle, a battle that I'd accepted and was willing to fight with happiness. But... I have reached a point in my life where I am beginning a battle with myself, my fight with "being" or let's say "living out my truth". I can't forget myself or get consumed into nurturing, though I have no problem giving my little girl whatever she needs, I feel that I need to find my truth before it's too late, if there's even a deadline for that. I feel like I've lost myself in motherhood a little, "letting yourself go" some might say, but not in the form of appearance but by ignoring my creative nature or finding what it is that I bring to this earth the time that I am here. 
Since having Sage we decided that we needed to get a home. Somewhere we can raise her together, better and as our own family. We wanted to stay in New York close to our family but we also wanted something different and simpler. Less fast pace and intimate. We fell in love with this small colonial home in suburban New Jersey, pedestaled on top of a hill, surrounded by life and greenery. I contested a little in the beginning considering that I've never been away from my family, and I wasn't so sure I was ready to take Sage away from them in fear of her not knowing who they are. However, apart of life is about moving forward with it, to be able to follow your truth and continue your journey, no matter who you have to leave behind. And besides, it's only an hour away from home, who the hell am I kidding??!!!! (lol). Now I realized that I am going through another stage in my life, I understand that I need to trust it accept what it is and be 100% grateful... I am... :) 


There's going to be a lot of changes to this blog as I try to become more transparent with you, thank you.

Saturday, August 26, 2017

Welcome Greens

I know, its been so long since I've posted on here. Please forgive me, but so much has changed, I mean dramatically. From moving back to Queens from Brooklyn, two completely opposite neighborhoods, to being a new full time mom, yes a mother! (Up coming post soon) So since becoming into a new mom, I had to reluctantly change my diet with a whole lot of cheat days too. Because lets admit it, we all fall into temptation for food, all kinds. I once in a while crave greens and one of my favorite greens are callaloo. This bunch was gifted from my neighbor where she grow in her backyard. I would love to plant a little vegetable farm but I seriously don't have a lot of time, or skills rather, if it even takes skills. Though, I one day shall try. 

There are many ways you eat callaloo. My mother pairs it with boiled green bananas, fried yellow plantains and maybe with a side of roast breadfruit. I swear its so good. You can also check out some Callaloo styles on Africanbites.com 

Monday, May 2, 2016

Mints & Pistachios

I turned 30 years old last month, and one thing I can say has changed about me is my view on womanhood and sexuality. Feeling grown and loving you as is, is imperative. And that means to be comfortable in the skin you're in as well finding the right pieces that will highlight your homemade goods. This dress from Tobi is beautiful and perfect for the spring and summer season, I love how the fabric sits, it is airy and the settle detailing makes me want to run through a meadow field of sunflowers. It gave me a country home feel, where you can just imagine sitting on your porch with lemonade and mints while waiting for that kissed summer breeze. 

Check out more pieces from Tobi here: Maxi Dresses, Dresses 
Sign up today, get 50% off your first purchase

Thursday, March 31, 2016

Bare with me...


Bare with me, every journey is your own. No one can tell you where to go, go back, turn left no turn right. The right way is your way whether you fail or succeed 

I have so many questions on the my life journey. My path seems clouded, crowded with errands, family, friends and duties. I forget my purpose, what I am supposed to be doing, I walk with my eyes covered and my heart shielded. I put my feelings and wants aside for the sake of others. In the mix of it all I lose my balance, my wants as well as happiness. Though I do not realize it until I stop, and think to myself and say "I am literally unhappy", why? Because I have forgotten myself. Forgotten my rules of life. 

I have so many things I want to talk about, I am hoping I can come around more to tell how I feel.

Thanks for reading
Sade

Tuesday, November 24, 2015

Overall Changes...

Classic vintage piece, you can not go wrong.
Hat: River Island
Turtleneck: Forever 21
Overalls: Vintage, L Train Vintage Brooklyn
Shoes: Converse

Tuesday, October 20, 2015

Disturbed Fleur...

Pardon my disappearing act, time has moved in fast-forward that I can't remember the in between. I have been trying to place priority first, given up posting, let go of social media and just shut off the world. Last year was, I can say, the worst year of my life. And now I feel like I am slowly picking up the pieces. Appreciating the smaller things and the changes, which, of course, a blessing in disguise. I was disturbed, emotional, and hurt. However, I didn't understand that the higher being had a bigger plan for me, and I am truly grateful. I just sit back and let shit happen, like it is suppose to. 

My flower suffocated, dismantled and poisoned. Disturbance changed my life, perspective and vision. 

Thank you for reading.
Sade

Wednesday, August 26, 2015

Definition...




When you need that one thing and have to fight to get it, does that mean it isn't meant for you? How do you know when to let things go just to live a normal life? Normal sounds so cliché, nothing is ever normal anymore. I am learning to put myself first but only if I knew this 10 years ago, never sacrifice your happiness for anything. Your happiness is what's important, whether if others get hurt, it’s you or them. 
 
 
 

Tuesday, August 11, 2015

Life Full of Sour Fruits...

You ever woke up wishing you had a talent, whether it is baking, sewing, singing or even refurbishing furniture. It makes you so angry because you feel as if your life is a waste. You work 9-5 miserably because you have to. Doing what you love and getting paid for it is a dream and an internal luxury. Why can’t we all live the dream? I thought life was all about happiness and its pursuit? But they won’t allow me to pursue, I have to work to eat. I realized that I am actually a robot, I am programmed to live this way. They lied to us, and we are forgiving them by working til 70. Then we must live their dream and die already.